Let me explain.
The anticipation was building as December 17th approached. This was the day our flights were booked to fly home for Christmas. We woke up that morning needing to de-ice the car and shovel it out. If you remember, we own a Scion. It's about the size of your fingernail. So it took a while for us to actually leave our home to head to the airport. We were driving to our pastor's home and he was going to drive us to the airport so we could leave our car there.
Little did we know, there was no reason to rush....
Our flight was at 12:15. When we booked the flight, we obviously had no idea that a snow storm would be come around 4:00 that same afternoon. So when we realized our flight was at 12:15, we felt pretty fortunate that our plane was leaving before the storm would hit. We wanted to be at the airport by 10 at the latest because of the holidays. We rushed to our pastor's house and switched our suitcases over to his car. Around 9:30 we made our way. We walk in the doors, and they ask where we're headed. "Atlanta," we said. The very sweet lady replied with, "Step right over here. There's an hour delay." WHAT? Okay cool. Knowing we had a two hour layover in Atlanta, and hour knocks it down. Okay, we can work with that. Less time sitting down in one of the busiest airports in America with a one year old. Yeah, we'll be fine. Psh.
We get through security quickly since we had a baby. [If you don't have one, you should. #justsayin] They let us through the first class line just to pass up all of the crazies traveling. We felt like we had so much favor [at this point...] We got through security in about five minutes. We scurried our way to our gate. A baby and diaper bag in one hand, a carry-on suitcase in other hand. Josh had a back pack on and was carrying the carseat. We got to the gate as fast as we could just so we could sit down and relax.....and get Abs to nap.
She wouldn't nap at first. So I took her to the play area:
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| Taking mini naps in the play area. |
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| Knocked out :) |
So we are at our gate by 10:15 and wait until our newly-expected departure of 1:50 PM. Abigail took a snooze on Josh while he knocked some reading out of the way for his January class as I patiently waited for her to wake up so we could get some food. Doesn't she know I'm always hungry? Get a grip, Abigail. Stop being so selfish.
Airports are so expensive. Get this: We got a grilled chicken sandwich, a hamburger, two fries, and two drinks for $24. Okay, would you like my arm and leg too? I almost don't even care because I'm so hungry and tired of waiting. At this point we had only been waiting for 2 1/2 hours. 1:20 comes around and it's the supposed time to board. Can I get a hallelujah? Once again, having a baby kicks into gear. We board first. We sit on the plane. We wait. We wait. We wait. It was us and some elderly ladies sitting on the plane. The rest of the plane hadn't boarded yet. Abigail even made some friends. I put her down so she could move around. There were only about 5 other people on the plane with us. Abigail makes her way a few rows up and starts giggling at this lady who seemed to be in her 80s. I walked over and scooped Abigail up and the lady asked me to sit down. We chatted for a few minutes....and then it happened. That's right people, she peed on my leg. Before you go assuming, it was Abigail who peed. Not the sweet old lady. Through her diaper. Through her pants. And now...through my pants. The day is beginning to feel a bit unfavorable....So far we have an hour and a half delay (and continuing...), an empty wallet from airport food, and two pairs of urine pants. I politely excuse Abigail and myself from talking with this lady and ask Josh for help. [He was befriending a man in the seat behind us with his little girl] Thankfully, I packed one extra pair of clothes for Abs that was in the carry-on bag.
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| Abs holding her old clothes while wearing new clothes. |
I know, I know. I'm supermom.
By the way, we're still on the plane waiting for the rest of the flight to board. We sat there for 45 minutes before anything happened. The flight attendants asked if we would like blankets because it was freezing on the plane. At this point, the snow had already started to fall and the wind was beginning to pick up speed. The flight attendant comes back to us and says we need to get off of the plane. They take our boarding passes back to show we are no longer on the plane. Abs has been a little angel-child so far. She hadn't cried or anything. Except pee her pants. So we're standing in the doorway where we are supposed to be boarding and they get on the intercom and say, "We're sorry for the inconvenience. Due to a maintenance problem, we will be delayed until 7:00 PM. We need a new part and will need to search the airport for an extra. Once we find it, we will take a test-flight and then begin to board."
Seriously, who announces this sort of information over an intercom? And really....a test-flight?! REALLY FEELING SAFE OVER HERE.
Just to recap, we got to the airport at 10:00 AM and it's now 2:00 PM. We wait around.....Abigail takes another nap. 4:00 rolls around and Josh decides this is for the birds. Aint nobody got time fa dis. He gets on the phone to a "Delta Agent" and they immediately shoot him down. He calls again, and a different agent answers the phone and got us on a 6:00 PM flight to Atlanta. #husbandishero We were confirmed on the flight. We got the last two seats...but let the waiting continue.
Daaaaaaaang. Another 2 hours until this new flight. Well of course I'm hungry again...So Abs woke up and we went for some more rip-me-off-grub. Two men from our original flight saw us and asked if we got our food voucher for the inconvenience. We never did, so they gave us the remainder of theirs. #Sweetypantz. Then we realized we DID in fact get them (we thought they were something else), and tried to give them back, but they said to just keep them to feed baby #1 and baby #2. I had the exact same chicken sandwich for dinner that I had from lunch. I didn't even care. I just needed food.....and a bed.
We go to the new gate, just a few down from where our first gate was. We sit down in the crowded and very loud area. Let me just sneak in a little tid-bit of information: Abigail has been constipated for days. DAYS. We look over and Abs face is spent-too-much-time-in-the-sun red....so Josh decides to take her to the bathroom. Next thing I know, I look over and I see my husband walking out of the airport bathroom with a baby in his arms that has just a diaper on. No, there were not any clothes in his hands. Please don't tell me....No, Lord, please no....He quietly sits down next to me with her and all he has to say is, "She crapped on my arm." Perfect timing Abigail. Flush out the good stuff on Daddy's arm in a jam-packed airport with limited supplies.
Eventually, Abigail settles back down and falls asleep in Josh's arms. #thishappenseveryday
Then all of a sudden this VERY southern (and loud) lady asks to take our picture. She says across the way, "Can I just take y'alls picture? I mean look at ya. Youre just so darn cute with your little baby boy. Is that a boy? Look at him sleepin' on your shoulder like that!" We chuckle, and politely state that our little boy is indeed a little girl. She was in a periwinkle, checkered dress. A DRESS. A minute later after getting our phone to take our picture for us (because we don't know what we look like #sarcasm), she says how darling HE is. Woman, open those southern eyes and ears. She's not a boy. She never was. She never will be. But now I know when our little guy is born in three months (whaaaaaat?!), he'll probably be the 'cutest little thing I've ever seen.' We heard this woman's entire life story, along with our entire gate-full of people. But boy was she a sweet heart. Little things like this made my day a little better. I couldn't stop giggling at her.
Eventually, Abigail settles back down and falls asleep in Josh's arms. #thishappenseveryday
Then all of a sudden this VERY southern (and loud) lady asks to take our picture. She says across the way, "Can I just take y'alls picture? I mean look at ya. Youre just so darn cute with your little baby boy. Is that a boy? Look at him sleepin' on your shoulder like that!" We chuckle, and politely state that our little boy is indeed a little girl. She was in a periwinkle, checkered dress. A DRESS. A minute later after getting our phone to take our picture for us (because we don't know what we look like #sarcasm), she says how darling HE is. Woman, open those southern eyes and ears. She's not a boy. She never was. She never will be. But now I know when our little guy is born in three months (whaaaaaat?!), he'll probably be the 'cutest little thing I've ever seen.' We heard this woman's entire life story, along with our entire gate-full of people. But boy was she a sweet heart. Little things like this made my day a little better. I couldn't stop giggling at her.
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| Meet our son, Abigail. |
Finally time to board our 6:00 flight! We knew we had confirmed seats, we were just waiting to hear where they were since we were just assigned this flight. By the time they called us up to give us our seat assignments, there were 42 people on the waiting list (because our original flight was looking like there was no hope...)
Everyone boarded and we waited 15 minutes. The pilot got on and said it'll be another 15 minutes. He did this three times y'all. After the third time, they said it was going to be "another 45 minutes...or more." The pilot said we couldn't leave the airport because of ice on the runway. Great. Our first flight had maintenance issues and this new flight has weather issues.
And this is where I had an epiphany. Delta is like high school boyfriends: They change their minds at any moment.
They told us we had an option to get off of the plane if we didn't want to wait. And at this point, we were ready to go home. (really...who would want to wait on a freezing cold air plane that was as motionless as Mt. Rushmore?) We'd been at the airport for 8 hours with a one year old. She was hungry. She was bored. And her bed time was an hour away. We decided, along with about 10 brilliant others, that we would get off the plane and check on our original part-less, unsafe plane. We check on that plane and it got pushed back to 10:45 for leaving the airport. A line instantly formed at the desk. Once we got up to the desk, we explain our issue. We tell them that we were given the option of getting off the plane, but our luggage and Ab's carseat was on the plane and we need it back. Long story short, (yeah right...) they said it was our poor judgement for getting off the plane when it would eventually take off. They said a big fat NO for getting our luggage and carseat back. And this is where I began to wonder if their hearts were made of stone. We explained the whole situation and asked about a hotel and they ever-so-unpolitely said the weather was not a valid excuse for a hotel stay. HELLO? Woman, our plane has been delayed for the past 8 hours (and counting....) because it was missing a part. She thought it would be funny to tell us, "What you should have done was stay on this flight and get a hotel in Atlanta." Okay. Yeah, we should have. Coulda, shoulda, woulda. BUT WE DIDN'T. DO YOU GET ME? WE. DID. NOT. STAY. ON. THE. PLANE. It was going nowhere....
ANYWAY. My goodness it has been over two weeks and thinking about this makes my eye start to twitch.
Have you ever washed clothes with hand soap and then had to blow-dry them? All I have to say is that our clothes were board-stiff afterward. I washed all 3 of our clothes and hung them in various places around the bathroom. #futuredesigner  |
| See ya later, Abigator. |
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| Not impressed with Delta. Crawl away. Crawl far, far away from Delta, baby girl. |
ANYWAY. My goodness it has been over two weeks and thinking about this makes my eye start to twitch.
Our pastor, the kind-hearted man that he is, braved the snow storm and picked us up at 9:30 PM. That's right people, we were at the airport for 12. straight. hours. He was the one that dropped us off. He was the one that picked us up.....and then eight hours later....he was the one who dropped us off...again.
The next day,we sat at our gate doubting the existence of DELTA. Will the plane even show up? I mean with our luck, the answer was clearly no... So instead of sitting at the gate looking all dirty, we decided now was the perfect time to use our vouchers that were given to us. I really wanted some of that hot apple cider goodness, but Starbucks was in some other concourse. Who were we kidding, we had plenty of time. So we walked down and hey made it apparent that they had never seen a voucher in their life...They told us they wouldn't work.
what.
All mama wants is some cider. Please, give to me for free. YOU OWE ME DELTA.
So we found Dunkin Donuts....and they said our vouchers didn't work either! If Delta thought they were getting another penny from us, they were sick in the head.
But the easy-goer that Josh is, I hear him say, "No problem. We'll just pay for it."
Jooooooosssshhhhhh. Did he forget that we'd been at the airport for like a decade?
Anyway, we boarded our flight, Abigail peed through her dang Walmart diapers for the sixth time (or something like that...we lost count) and ended up having to fly to Columbus, Ohio. What in the world...As we wait for our flight to board, another elderly lady approaches Abigail. This time, a little more opinionated. "How old is that little gal? Two?", she asked with an English accent. (I know you're saying this out loud for full effect... go ahead, I dare you) "She's 13 months," I told her with a boring Niceville-non-boggy-accent. "My, my, she's quite large for her age!" Big mama say whaaaaaat? She's only in the 10th percentile for her weight! I let it slide with a little snicker.
Next stop: Atlanta, Georgia.
At this point, we have been swarmed by people, some rude, some sweet. But our legs were exhausted. Our backs were hurting. And our souls, oh our souls. They were needing some encouragement because we about lost hope. We just needed a little laughter......We're now boarded and waiting for take off. I look over and Josh is laughing really hard...as quietly as possible. I'm over here wanting what he has. Gimme that laughter! "What the heck is wrong with you?!" So he pulls out his phone and texts me. Apparently the young man behind us (and when I say young, I don't mean 9 years old. I mean early-thirties) was with his girlfriend and it was his first time flying. Oh this is gonna be good....this is gonna be real good! Just picture this while you read: An athletic, lean, 6-foot, "swag," kind of guy has never been on a plane before. Just looking at him you'd think he was rugged and tough. The plane starts to move, I'd say about 6 mph....about to take off....and we hear, "OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG!!!! Slow down, slow dowwwwwn!" Y'all. We haven't even left yet! The poor guy is practically wheezing. Okay, it gets better. We immediately take off (wheels just lifting off of the ground) and the guy's girlfriend screams, "PRAISE JESUS!!!" Apparently he wasn't the only scared one. :)
Thank you, Lord for answering my prayer. I asked for laughter and encouragement, and I got it. I just didn't think it'd be through a wimpy man :) Kidding.
During mid-flight when seat belts are able to be taken off (Thank God, I'm dad gum pregnant), we let Abigail stand up and stretch her tiny, meaty legs. In the row next to us (3x3 aisles), the lady on the outside got up to use the restroom. So Abigail made her way over to the lady in the middle seat. I nudge Josh, "Uhhh....look at your daughter..." and he tells me that she doesn't speak English. Okay....cool. Five seconds later we see the lady putting her arms out saying a few words that mean nothing to me with a big grin on her face.And then guess what. Abigail. puts. her. hands. out. to. her. Ole' Abs.
The flight was smooth. As we're seeking to land, the plane tilts a bit as it circles the airport before landing. The guy behind us nervously (and I mean nervously....we could hear his legs stomping 50mph) says, "Man, is that really necessary?!" #daymade
Now to Pensacola, Florida.
Then drive an hour to get home.
What a day.
What TWO days.
We finally arrive in Pensacola to meet Josh's dad. I told Josh it would just be my luck to lose my suitcase full of maternity and baby clothes. I know you are smart enough to figure out what eventually happened....They lost my luggage and Abigail's carseat.
PERFECT!! How in the world were we going to get home without a carseat? And let's be real here..how in the world was I going to fit into someone else's clothes to borrow? My belly is bigger than a beach ball and I still have 14 weeks to go.
We dealt with the Baggage claim for a while to try and track our luggage. They said there was a possibility it was in Atlanta, but weren't sure. Okay.................So we had to make a pit stop at Target (hello, favorite store! It never ceases to find me!) and buy REAL diapers, you know, the kind that actually holds some liquid, a pair of clothes for Abigail because we walked out of the airport with her in a diaper (Don't worry. It was 75 degrees outside), and a pair of pajamas for me. Remember how Abigail peed on me....Yeah
I had to keep reminding myself that this day couldn't get any better. It was as good as it was gonna get.
But then we met our mamas at Cracker Barrel. And that's when the day really did get better. Country fried chicken, mashed potatoes, dumplings, and some mac-n-cheese really hit the spot.
Fast forward a day. My luggage finally came in at 7:30 PM! Finally the end to all of this mess.
And here I am today.
Writing in the Panama City airport. January 5th, 18 days later. Sitting, waiting, wishing. (Jack Johnson, you da man) We should be landing in Boston right now. But instead, we're moping over plane delays, hanging on the edge of our seats, waiting for them to say, 'January fools!!' Y'all I'm so hungry. Airport food is dog food to me. Josh gets Abigail to sleep, and I of course, make my way to a concession stand. If you haven't been to the Panama City Airport, it's tiny. I'm talking one restaurant, and one stand with hardly any snacks. Enough with the complaining. I spend $4 on a sample-size cheez-it pack and some crackers. Not even enough to satisfy a baby. Not even kidding you, as I walk back to the gate, the attendant says, "We're sorry for the inconvenience of having to wait for our flight, so we have provided free drinks, snacks, and cross-word puzzles."
Are you kidding me. I could have saved $4 if my pregnant butt could have waited 2 more minutes. So you better believe I went over and got some snacks and drinks for us.
We were told that our flight at 10:35 AM would be delayed until 12:20. Then 1:50. Then 2:40. Then 3:45. So we hung around, as if we had anywhere else to go, and prayed for Josh. The stress was about to eat him up. The whole reason we planned to come back January 5th was because he started class on the 6th. He has a week-long class M-F 9-5. By the way things were looking, we weren't going to make it, or at least get in to Boston very, very late Monday night. So we silently prayed throughout the morning and asked for God to make a way, whether someone in the class takes notes for Josh, or he miraculously doesn't miss anything. Josh e-mailed his professor to let him know that he may not make the first half of class the next day, and a few hours later he receives and email back from his professor.
It stated that his professor (who is a professor at Moody Bible Institute and was flying to Boston just to teach this class for the week...) was in Chicago and his flight had just been canceled due to the weather. So class on Monday would in fact be canceled.
WHAT.
What are the chances??
This relieved so much pressure........except we were STILL stuck in the airport.
We finally got on the plane, flew to ATL and then what was expected to happen, did. Yep. We missed the only two flights into Boston. And because it was weather-related, they weren't going to give us hotel vouchers. First thing is first: I have got to use the restroom. My goodness. with a baby in my belly pressing on my bladder and a toddler who likes to sit on my lap and tap my belly, there's a very slim chance of me not peeing my pants. I come back and Josh hands Abs to me while he goes to see what the deal is with our luggage. He comes back with two thumbs up...and now to figure out what in the world we're going to do in order to sleep...since our plane ISN'T COMING 'TIL MORNING.
And this is where we brag about having the best friends, like.....eva. They told us to call them as soon as we found out if we needed a hotel or not, and hooked us up with a beautiful hotel.
We go as fast as we can to get OUT of the airport. I'm talking like....walking 57mph. I have Abigail in my left arm, her "diaper bag" (an excuse to have another carry-on...) and Josh has a small carry-on wheely suitcase (that might I add was so heavy, the handle wouldn't even come up without throwing your back out), a back pack heavier than a sack full of cinder blocks, our camera & bag, and the carseat. Two people carrying all of this. I'd say 3, but Abigail did a whole lot of nothing. Actually, I'll tell you what she did do. As we're walking full-force to exit the airport, my left hand and arm suddenly feel wet. Oh no she didn't. Did she seriously just pee on me AGAIN?! We threw those stupid Walmart diapers out! The girl was wearing Huggies this time. How. Can. This. Be. Happening.
My left arm is about to fall off at this point. Abigail is legitimately falling out of my arm. "Josh, I need a break. I can't hold her any more. And my arm feels wet." He replies, "Oh no, probably just pee. Let's wait until the hotel. We're almost there!" Then he checks just to be safe. Well, my jacket is black, so no matter what bodily fluids leaked out on me, I had no idea. All I knew was that my arm was wet. Josh hardly says a word. He smells his hand (sorry for all you visual learners out there) and says, "She pooped. Again." He takes her from me, I set the stuff down, including myself, and he takes the diaper bag and our child to the men's room. Four minutes later, he walks out with Abigail in his arms wearing a grey jacket that has two buttons (can you say #midriff?) and white stockings.
That's it.
It's 20 degrees outside. But we had no other clothes...She peed through all of them! I don't blame her though. I was so ticked at Delta, I almost peed my pants too.
Anyway, we make it to the Marriott. I so wish I could explain how beautiful it was, but we literally checked in, went to bed, and woke up at 5:00 AM to repeat this so called "adventure." We had a problem though. We had no clean clothes for our plane ride the next day. Abigail sure as heck had no clothes. It was too late to stay up and do laundry. So we wash our clothes in the sink. Like people from the 1400s did.
what.
All mama wants is some cider. Please, give to me for free. YOU OWE ME DELTA.
So we found Dunkin Donuts....and they said our vouchers didn't work either! If Delta thought they were getting another penny from us, they were sick in the head.
But the easy-goer that Josh is, I hear him say, "No problem. We'll just pay for it."
Jooooooosssshhhhhh. Did he forget that we'd been at the airport for like a decade?
Anyway, we boarded our flight, Abigail peed through her dang Walmart diapers for the sixth time (or something like that...we lost count) and ended up having to fly to Columbus, Ohio. What in the world...As we wait for our flight to board, another elderly lady approaches Abigail. This time, a little more opinionated. "How old is that little gal? Two?", she asked with an English accent. (I know you're saying this out loud for full effect... go ahead, I dare you) "She's 13 months," I told her with a boring Niceville-non-boggy-accent. "My, my, she's quite large for her age!" Big mama say whaaaaaat? She's only in the 10th percentile for her weight! I let it slide with a little snicker.
Next stop: Atlanta, Georgia.
At this point, we have been swarmed by people, some rude, some sweet. But our legs were exhausted. Our backs were hurting. And our souls, oh our souls. They were needing some encouragement because we about lost hope. We just needed a little laughter......We're now boarded and waiting for take off. I look over and Josh is laughing really hard...as quietly as possible. I'm over here wanting what he has. Gimme that laughter! "What the heck is wrong with you?!" So he pulls out his phone and texts me. Apparently the young man behind us (and when I say young, I don't mean 9 years old. I mean early-thirties) was with his girlfriend and it was his first time flying. Oh this is gonna be good....this is gonna be real good! Just picture this while you read: An athletic, lean, 6-foot, "swag," kind of guy has never been on a plane before. Just looking at him you'd think he was rugged and tough. The plane starts to move, I'd say about 6 mph....about to take off....and we hear, "OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG!!!! Slow down, slow dowwwwwn!" Y'all. We haven't even left yet! The poor guy is practically wheezing. Okay, it gets better. We immediately take off (wheels just lifting off of the ground) and the guy's girlfriend screams, "PRAISE JESUS!!!" Apparently he wasn't the only scared one. :)
Thank you, Lord for answering my prayer. I asked for laughter and encouragement, and I got it. I just didn't think it'd be through a wimpy man :) Kidding.
During mid-flight when seat belts are able to be taken off (Thank God, I'm dad gum pregnant), we let Abigail stand up and stretch her tiny, meaty legs. In the row next to us (3x3 aisles), the lady on the outside got up to use the restroom. So Abigail made her way over to the lady in the middle seat. I nudge Josh, "Uhhh....look at your daughter..." and he tells me that she doesn't speak English. Okay....cool. Five seconds later we see the lady putting her arms out saying a few words that mean nothing to me with a big grin on her face.And then guess what. Abigail. puts. her. hands. out. to. her. Ole' Abs.
The flight was smooth. As we're seeking to land, the plane tilts a bit as it circles the airport before landing. The guy behind us nervously (and I mean nervously....we could hear his legs stomping 50mph) says, "Man, is that really necessary?!" #daymade
Now to Pensacola, Florida.
Then drive an hour to get home.
What a day.
What TWO days.
We finally arrive in Pensacola to meet Josh's dad. I told Josh it would just be my luck to lose my suitcase full of maternity and baby clothes. I know you are smart enough to figure out what eventually happened....They lost my luggage and Abigail's carseat.
PERFECT!! How in the world were we going to get home without a carseat? And let's be real here..how in the world was I going to fit into someone else's clothes to borrow? My belly is bigger than a beach ball and I still have 14 weeks to go.
We dealt with the Baggage claim for a while to try and track our luggage. They said there was a possibility it was in Atlanta, but weren't sure. Okay.................So we had to make a pit stop at Target (hello, favorite store! It never ceases to find me!) and buy REAL diapers, you know, the kind that actually holds some liquid, a pair of clothes for Abigail because we walked out of the airport with her in a diaper (Don't worry. It was 75 degrees outside), and a pair of pajamas for me. Remember how Abigail peed on me....Yeah
I had to keep reminding myself that this day couldn't get any better. It was as good as it was gonna get.
But then we met our mamas at Cracker Barrel. And that's when the day really did get better. Country fried chicken, mashed potatoes, dumplings, and some mac-n-cheese really hit the spot.
Fast forward a day. My luggage finally came in at 7:30 PM! Finally the end to all of this mess.
Or so I thought........
And here I am today.
Writing in the Panama City airport. January 5th, 18 days later. Sitting, waiting, wishing. (Jack Johnson, you da man) We should be landing in Boston right now. But instead, we're moping over plane delays, hanging on the edge of our seats, waiting for them to say, 'January fools!!' Y'all I'm so hungry. Airport food is dog food to me. Josh gets Abigail to sleep, and I of course, make my way to a concession stand. If you haven't been to the Panama City Airport, it's tiny. I'm talking one restaurant, and one stand with hardly any snacks. Enough with the complaining. I spend $4 on a sample-size cheez-it pack and some crackers. Not even enough to satisfy a baby. Not even kidding you, as I walk back to the gate, the attendant says, "We're sorry for the inconvenience of having to wait for our flight, so we have provided free drinks, snacks, and cross-word puzzles."
Are you kidding me. I could have saved $4 if my pregnant butt could have waited 2 more minutes. So you better believe I went over and got some snacks and drinks for us.
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| Probably equivalent to $37 in airport cash. |
It stated that his professor (who is a professor at Moody Bible Institute and was flying to Boston just to teach this class for the week...) was in Chicago and his flight had just been canceled due to the weather. So class on Monday would in fact be canceled.
WHAT.
What are the chances??
This relieved so much pressure........except we were STILL stuck in the airport.
We finally got on the plane, flew to ATL and then what was expected to happen, did. Yep. We missed the only two flights into Boston. And because it was weather-related, they weren't going to give us hotel vouchers. First thing is first: I have got to use the restroom. My goodness. with a baby in my belly pressing on my bladder and a toddler who likes to sit on my lap and tap my belly, there's a very slim chance of me not peeing my pants. I come back and Josh hands Abs to me while he goes to see what the deal is with our luggage. He comes back with two thumbs up...and now to figure out what in the world we're going to do in order to sleep...since our plane ISN'T COMING 'TIL MORNING.
And this is where we brag about having the best friends, like.....eva. They told us to call them as soon as we found out if we needed a hotel or not, and hooked us up with a beautiful hotel.
We go as fast as we can to get OUT of the airport. I'm talking like....walking 57mph. I have Abigail in my left arm, her "diaper bag" (an excuse to have another carry-on...) and Josh has a small carry-on wheely suitcase (that might I add was so heavy, the handle wouldn't even come up without throwing your back out), a back pack heavier than a sack full of cinder blocks, our camera & bag, and the carseat. Two people carrying all of this. I'd say 3, but Abigail did a whole lot of nothing. Actually, I'll tell you what she did do. As we're walking full-force to exit the airport, my left hand and arm suddenly feel wet. Oh no she didn't. Did she seriously just pee on me AGAIN?! We threw those stupid Walmart diapers out! The girl was wearing Huggies this time. How. Can. This. Be. Happening.
My left arm is about to fall off at this point. Abigail is legitimately falling out of my arm. "Josh, I need a break. I can't hold her any more. And my arm feels wet." He replies, "Oh no, probably just pee. Let's wait until the hotel. We're almost there!" Then he checks just to be safe. Well, my jacket is black, so no matter what bodily fluids leaked out on me, I had no idea. All I knew was that my arm was wet. Josh hardly says a word. He smells his hand (sorry for all you visual learners out there) and says, "She pooped. Again." He takes her from me, I set the stuff down, including myself, and he takes the diaper bag and our child to the men's room. Four minutes later, he walks out with Abigail in his arms wearing a grey jacket that has two buttons (can you say #midriff?) and white stockings.
That's it.
It's 20 degrees outside. But we had no other clothes...She peed through all of them! I don't blame her though. I was so ticked at Delta, I almost peed my pants too.
Anyway, we make it to the Marriott. I so wish I could explain how beautiful it was, but we literally checked in, went to bed, and woke up at 5:00 AM to repeat this so called "adventure." We had a problem though. We had no clean clothes for our plane ride the next day. Abigail sure as heck had no clothes. It was too late to stay up and do laundry. So we wash our clothes in the sink. Like people from the 1400s did.
I'm trying to get Abigail to bed by reading her a story. She's smacking my belly saying her little brother's name, and then my nose starts bleeding. What in the world. Go to bed, child. Josh finally gets her to sleep by beat-boxing and tapping on her back while I finish washing the clothes...and stuffing toilet paper up my nose to stop the bleeding.
And then Josh is all like, "Oh my gosh. I need deodorant. Like a man NEEDS deodorant." And I'm all like, "call the front desk." And he's all like, "do you think the'll have some?" Josh Pool. Get it together. Call the front desk. So I overhear him, "Hi, just a quick question. Do you know where I could get some MEN'S deodorant or toothpaste?....Oh great! Thank you so much. If you don't mind bringing it up here and knocking quietly, our baby is sleeping." Five minutes pass and we hear a tiny knock. I go to the door and find the toothpaste and deodorant....But why is it purple? I turn it around and read the label and this is what I find:
Lady Speed Stick!!!!!!
I walked over to Josh to slowly break the news...but I couldn't get the words out of my mouth. Maybe I was just entirely too delirious. But I mean I was chain-smoker laughing. Look at the bright side, it's 24 hour hold! He's gonna be smelling good.
So we're so exhausted, but there were awesome reading lamps hanging off the wall. What else to do other than act younger than your child and make shadow puppets?
But then we realized we needed to be awake so soon....So we decided the more responsible thing would be to sleep. Not make puppets. Dangit.
Josh's alarm goes off at 5:00 AM (he pushed snooze). My phone alarm goes off at 5:10 AM. Josh's phone goes off again at 5:15 AM. Ughhhhhhh. I don't wanna wake up. and I DEFINITELY don't want to get on a plane and get offered more peanuts and pretzels. Someone knock me out, PLEASE.
It was our goal to be walking out of the hotel by 5:45 because our plane was leaving at 7:30. But if you've ever checked in to Atlanta airport and gone through security, you know you have to leave early. We packed all of our stuff up and then woke Abs up. That girl is the happiest baby I've ever seen. She literally woke up, stood up, and started laughing at us. Maybe because we looked like idiots pacing back and forth making sure we had everything. Or maybe because I couldn't shut the luggage, I had to sit on it.
Have you ever seen a pregnant woman shut a suitcase?
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I failed to mention that we did not meet our goal of 5:45....We left at 6:02. #parenthood. #IblameDelta. #IwillalwaysblameDelta.
Anyway, we rush to the airport. Get on the Marta. Jump on the trolly. Go through security....It's like a mob of buffalos high on Starbucks in there. My goodness. There had to have been 12 lines for security. By this time, it's 6:30 and we still haven't gone through security. Lord have mercy. I'm starving and I cannot wait until getting to Boston to eat breakfast. Someone get me through security......And then a security officer opened a new line! So we got through super fast! #thereisaGod! #justkidding #butseriouslythereis
Yada yada yada, so we get to the gate and have a whole six minutes to eat a chicken biscuit the size of my belly button. We board the plane first (I'm telling you....have a baby. You go first :)) and wait for about 30 minutes until takeoff. There was a very nice man who saw us struggling with all of our things. All he said was, "I have 3 kids under 3." with a smile on his face. He gently took the carry-on that was hardly mobile, and helped us get on the plane. He was a few people behind us, so Josh waited for him and Abigail and I got to our seats first. As we're bumping seats trying to walk through the aisle, I notice a very, VERY chipper man. He's was probably mid-sixties. grey hair. dimples. cute little thing. sitting all by himself......singing VERY loudly, "Zipadeedoodaaaaa zipadeeday. My oh my what a wonderful day!".....but that wasn't all. He sang every. single. word. Immediately made me smile. Today's gonna be a good day.
A few minutes later, Josh sat down. I said, "YES. Finally. We'll be home in TWO HOURS!!!"
And....I was wrong again. There were screens on the backseat of the seat in front of us. You can play games, request food, watch movies (All for only $6!...) and track our flight. Josh and I clicked the "Track your flight!" button and saw a bunch of cool information. It said how fast we were going, how high we were, how much time was left, and how far we have gone. It also showed a map of where we were compared to where we were going. As we watch the time decrease because we were getting closer and closer to home, we noticed the altitude was still the same. Next thing you know, the pilot comes on and says, "Folks, the tail wind has picked up at a speed where we're not yet able to land. We may be experiencing some 'rough air.'" Great. My favorite terms together. Airplane + rough air. The time keeps getting lower and lower....It says we have 21 minutes until we're landing. Pilot comes on again, "There's a back up in planes landing in Boston due to high tail winds. It may be a little while." Ooooooooookay.
And then we notice this on the screen:
Boston is north. We are now going south. Time to destination says 0 minutes. WHY ARE WE GOING THE WRONG WAY?
".....*long drawn out sigh*....This is your captain again. It seems as though another plane attempted to land and didn't make it so they are back in the air flying to a different airport." I'm sorry but...did he just say they "didn't make it?" What is with these pilots? First we get a pilot who says we're going to take a test flight to try the new plane part out....and now we have a pilot who says another plane "didn't make it" (don't worry, they didn't crash. They just 'didn't make it.') Then get THIS. He comes BACK on the intercom and says, "Folks, as the tail winds are still to high to land, we have also run out of extra delay fuel. We're going to need to land at JFK airport." FOR THE LOVE. CLEARLY there is no exam on punctuality in order to become a pilot. I'm practically shaking because he just made me think that we're about to crash. My stomach is twisting from the turbulence and looking out the window seeing nothing but white. I mean NOTHING but white. I felt like I was in a dream. A really sick dream. Josh leans over to get the barf bag just in case. My sinuses are now all messed up. The seatbelt sign has come on 97 times because of turbulence. Abigail caught a cold while in Florida, so we've run out of tissues. We can't get up because that dang seat belt sign. There's a lady on the outside seat (who doesn't speak English) so Josh has to push the "attention" button for the flight attendant to bring us tissues. She brings us 2 napkins that say, "Thanks for flying Delta!" Which makes me want to really throw up now. A minute later, those 2 napkins have been used....So now what? My nose is like a water hose and I have nothing. And then I look down.
And I find something far better than a Delta napkin. Something that absorbs more than a Delta napkin. And something much bigger than a Delta napkin.
A Diaper.
I had no choice, people.
We finally land in New York. And I just had to call my girl, Casy. All we could do was laugh. OF COURSE this happens. The pilot says "This could be about 45 minutes." I'm all like, "45 minutes?! I have a baby who needs to eat lunch!" We were supposed to be IN Boston at 10:03. It's now 11:30....in New York. Sidenote: Abigail slept the whole way, from takeoff to landing. And then we landed and she woke up. Her diaper is wet, so we need to change her....but I had to make sure it wasn't the diaper used to blow my nose. Right. So we ask the woman next to Josh if she could stand up so we could change her, except we had to use hand gestures because she didn't speak English. We get her changed, waste a little time, and then the pilot comes BACK on. "Well, there are some men in the cargo section of the plane. I'm not really sure what they're doing. I'll let you guys know when I know."
This man cannot be real.
Then he comes back on to tell us things are looking good, we'll be leaving within 3-4 minutes.
I knew what that meant.
3-4 hours sounds more realistic.
After spending an hour and a half in a state we had no intentions on stopping in, we finally take off. And by this point, I wouldn't be surprised if we landed in Uruguay. So my hopes weren't very high you could say. Forty minutes later, we land. IN BOSTON! THIS can't be real! We actually made it! All we had left was to make sure our luggage and ride was actually at the air port.
Fewf. It was. So thankful. So, so thankful.
And this was just a small portion of our long, very extended trip.
But really, despite this ridiculous chaos, we are so thankful to have been able to visit home. It was so fun bringing Abigail home to see all the people she only sees on the FaceTime screen. It was worth the stress and anxiety. But....I truly am SO glad to be back here in Massachusetts. Two days later and we still aren't unpacked.
Our life. Chaotic. Stressful. Exhausting. Amazing.
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